Awful :(

I feel like I'm being tortured. I hate leaving Liam in the morning to go to work. I should be so grateful to have a job and be able to pay our bills, but I hate that I have a job and I hate that I have bills. All I want is to be near him, to hold him, to comfort him. He is part of me and still too small to be away from me. I can't help but feel this is all too early, he's just too little, that I shouldn't be away from him. It's a physical pain, almost like I can't breathe, when I drive away from him in the mornings. I thought it would get easier but it's worse. And I don't know if I will ever be able to forgive myself for missing these days.